Stuff People Ask Us Sometimes (FAQ)

What’s different about Monster Oil? Why you, and not [insert famous brand]’s lubricant? Tell me some sciencey stuff.

Our groundbreaking EcoPro line of lubricants is a plant-based, renewable synthetic oil that outperforms any other oil we've ever tried. (We've tried them all!). When we started with the first samples in this line we were blown away that a plant-based oil could keep up with (and surpass) the leading synthetic oils on the market (including ours!). But it did. So we developed a complete line utilizing this base oil.

EcoPro acts exactly like a synthetic oil. It doesn't go rancid or spoil. It doesn't have any funny smells. And it doesn't have any untoward interactions with other oils.

And of course there is our classic line of oils:

The element that fundamentally sets the classic line apart is the base oil. It’s the cleanest synthetic on the market and has been used in the aerospace and automotive industries as well as NASA for many years. We spent the twelve months working with our supplier to achieve the best “cocktail” of ingredients we could find. As professional trumpet players who play every single day, part of our research involved using and evaluating this oil every time we picked up our horns until we were confident that it was perfect.

What's your stuff made with?

Our EcoPro line is made with sustainable, renewable plants! Zero petroleum.

Our classic line of oil is:

base oil (for the slipperiness)
solvent (to achieve the right viscosity and keep things clean)
copper passivator (to keep the corrosion away).

The trick was finding the proper amounts and types of these ingredients – which we finally did!

And if all that wasn’t enough: we are an all-American company – our oil, packaging, and Schwarzeneggeresque (it's a word, look it up) physiques are all made in the States.

Do you test this on animals?

We don't use animal testing for any of our products. Except sometimes Joel gets a little nervous when he sees a Yorkshire Terrier without a leash and will on occasion throw a bottle at the dog in a panic. There have been no ill effects shown to the animal when Joel does this because he usually misses.

I love you guys!! I have a _________ trumpet from 1742. What kind of oil do I need?

EcoPro Lite is probably best for most folks.

EcoPro Heavy is only for horns that need a very thick oil.
The slide oil is for slides you want to move on the fly (such as trumpet 1st and 3rd slides).
And the grease is very heavy - works great on slides you want to stay put.

What if I hate my Monster Oil?! Gosh Monster guys, you are the worst.

We are committed to maintaining a relationship with the brass community for the long haul. To that end, we offer the following:

If you order an oil from us and feel that it is the wrong viscosity, we will send you a different viscosity oil free of charge! We know of no other company that offers this. We want you to be a customer for life, and will do anything to make you happy. (cue Meatloaf - “But we won't do that...”)

How can I possibly ever express how much I love you?

If you have any musical odes, serenades, or chansons d'amour on the subject of Monster Oil, we would love to hear them. There’s a good chance they would end up on our social media pages. Now that we mention it, honestly, please come poke us, or tweet on us, or whatever you’re supposed to do on the Facebooks and Twitter. Our Facebook handle is Monster Oil, LLC, and if the Tweet's your thing, we're @MonsterOils.

If you’ve read down this far, it means one of two things:

…You’re one of our moms. Or,
You still have some questions for us.

If either of those sounds like you, we are always around and would love to hear from you, for serious! Please email any or all of us at:

monsteroilllc@gmail.com